{"id":604,"date":"2024-08-14T10:06:43","date_gmt":"2024-08-14T10:06:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ehlendergisi.com\/?p=604"},"modified":"2024-08-16T15:02:56","modified_gmt":"2024-08-16T15:02:56","slug":"musabin-son-gunu","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/ehlendergisi.com\/index.php\/2024\/08\/14\/musabin-son-gunu\/","title":{"rendered":"MUSAB\u2019IN SON G\u00dcN\u00dc"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

MUSTAFA KEMAL ERS\u00d6Z<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018’al\u00e2 h\u00e2dhihi l-ard m\u00e2 yastahiqqu l-hay\u00e2t \u2019\u2019\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/em>
(Mahmut Dervi\u015f)*\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Her \u015feyin ve herkesin bir ismi olmas\u0131 gerekti\u011fine olan meraktan \u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fc onun bile bir ad\u0131 vard\u0131. Onu \u201cMusab\u201d diye \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131yorlar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Musab, k\u00f6\u015fedeki ki\u015fi, kenardaki ki\u015fi evet o, orada duran i\u015fte otob\u00fcs dura\u011f\u0131n\u0131n kenar\u0131nda bir omzunu cama dayam\u0131\u015f olan; dayanaks\u0131z Musab, otob\u00fcs geciktik\u00e7e bir sigara daha yak\u0131yor. Omuzlar\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fck, kavruk benzi sar\u0131ya \u00e7al\u0131yor, t\u0131ra\u015f\u0131 gecikmi\u015f. Bu biraz da huydur onda yani, gecikmek. H\u00fcz\u00fcnl\u00fc g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcyor ama onun hakk\u0131nda daha en ba\u015ftan bilmeniz gereken baz\u0131 \u015feyler var.  Onlardan biri de Musab hi\u00e7bir duyguyu hakikatle, hakk\u0131yla ya\u015fayamaz.  O, ancak h\u00fcz\u00fcnl\u00fc g\u00f6r\u00fcnebilir. Musab en \u00e7ok onu g\u00f6r\u00fcnce kederlenece\u011finiz ama daha da ziyade onun ad\u0131na h\u00fcz\u00fcnlenece\u011finiz biridir. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

H\u00fcz\u00fcnl\u00fc g\u00f6r\u00fcnen Musab, yirminci y\u00fczy\u0131l\u0131n doksan \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnc\u00fc senesinin ikinci ay\u0131n\u0131n be\u015finci g\u00fcn\u00fcn\u00fc alt\u0131nc\u0131 g\u00fcne ba\u011flayan gecenin ge\u00e7 saatlerinde Suriye\u2019nin kuzeyi, T\u00fcrkiye\u2019nin g\u00fcneyi Ortado\u011fu\u2019nun g\u00f6be\u011fi cehennemin ta dibine be\u015f \u00e7ocuklu bir ailenin son evlad\u0131 olarak do\u011fdu. \u00d6yle g\u00f6zle g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcr bir yoksullu\u011fu, yoksunlu\u011fu yoktu. Varsa da kendindendir. Bir yan\u0131yla bu, biraz da onun \u015fahsi meselesidir. Do\u011fmu\u015f bulundu\u011fu yer hakk\u0131nda neler s\u00f6ylenebilirdi? Tenha bir yerdi. Bu oraya ili\u015fkin kayda de\u011fer nadir \u015feylerden biri olabilir.\u00a0\u00a0K\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 toprak \u00fczerinde uzanan alabildi\u011fine geni\u015f bo\u015fluklar vard\u0131. Bo\u015flu\u011fun uzam\u0131nda sesler \u00e7ok uzaktan \u00e7o\u011fu kez belli belirsiz bazan parlayarak bazan uzay\u0131p s\u00f6n\u00fcmlenerek, u\u011fultular olarak ancak i\u015fitilebilirdi.\u00a0\u00a0Mitik Musab, biraz da ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 yere benzerdi.\u00a0\u00a0Memleketi de t\u0131pk\u0131 Musab\u2019\u0131n akl\u0131ndaki hi\u00e7bir yere, hi\u00e7bir zaman kamilen yerle\u015fmeyi beceremeyen, k\u00f6k sal\u0131p, ye\u015feremeyen u\u00e7u\u015fup duran fikirleri gibiydi. Pastoral Musab\u2019\u0131n, do\u011fdu\u011fu yer gitgide daha fazla i\u00e7ine, kendine do\u011fru kapanan, nihayet bir sabaha kar\u015f\u0131 y\u0131k\u0131l\u0131p g\u00f6\u00e7\u00fcp giden bir yerdi.\u00a0\u00a0Musab da i\u00e7ine kapan\u0131k biriydi. Hep biraz tedirgin, konu\u015furken aceleci, \u00fcrkek, dinleyeni konu\u015fan\u0131n haline ac\u0131maktan m\u00fctevellit, h\u00fcz\u00fcnlendirecek kadar mahcup, hani nas\u0131l diyorlar; eril enerjisi d\u00fc\u015f\u00fck Musab, hep biraz tenha kald\u0131.\u00a0\u0130\u00e7ine kapan\u0131k gizemi \u00e7ar\u00e7abuk \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fclene dek\u00a0ancak katlan\u0131labilen Musab, d\u00fcnden mahcup, bug\u00fcnden tedirgin, yar\u0131ndan \u00fcrkek, d\u00fcn neydi ki bug\u00fcn ne olsun? Yar\u0131n olacak m\u0131?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Otob\u00fcs menzilde g\u00f6r\u00fcld\u00fc. Zaten d\u00fc\u015f\u00fck olan omuzlar\u0131n\u0131 kamburu \u00e7\u0131karcas\u0131na devirerek yakla\u015fan otob\u00fcse bak\u0131nd\u0131. Aln\u0131n\u0131 ve y\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc buru\u015fturacak kadar g\u00f6zlerini k\u0131sarak otob\u00fcs\u00fcn istikamet tabelas\u0131n\u0131 okumaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131.  En ufak g\u00fcndelik anda bile kendinden emin olamayan Musab, otob\u00fcs yakla\u015ft\u0131k\u00e7a tedirgin olmaya ba\u015flad\u0131. –Buna m\u0131 binmeliyim? \u2013 Hemen mi bineyim? – Acaba binebilecek miyim?  -\u0130nsanlar bunu doldursun di\u011ferine daha rahat binerim?<\/em>  G\u00fcndelik k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck sorulara bile cevab\u0131 olmayan b\u00fcy\u00fck davalar\u0131n insan\u0131 Musab, –<\/em> \u00f6yle biri i\u015fte en sars\u0131lmaz ilkelerin, y\u00fcksek \u015fiarlar\u0131n Don Ki\u015fot\u2019u, annesinin k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck o\u011flu, mukavemetsiz Musab, telkine, muhta\u00e7 ta\u015fradan Musab, iradesini teslime d\u00fcnden raz\u0131, mucizelere kani Musab, bakt\u0131 ki kimse kendisini kurtaramayacak i\u015f ba\u015fa d\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc. Dura\u011fa yana\u015fan otob\u00fcs\u00fcn kap\u0131s\u0131na do\u011fru se\u011firtti.  Kap\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6n\u00fcne ak\u0131n eden insan kafilesinin \u00f6n saflar\u0131nda olmas\u0131na ra\u011fmen \u00f6n saflar\u0131n neferi Musab, her \u00f6n\u00fcne ge\u00e7meye yeltenene itirazs\u0131z m\u00fcsaade etti. Kap\u0131ya d\u00fczensiz y\u0131\u011f\u0131lan ba\u015f\u0131bozuk otob\u00fcs kuyru\u011funda gittik\u00e7e gerilere do\u011fru d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcp otob\u00fcse iyi bir yerden binebilme, hatta binebilme umudundan uzakla\u015ft\u0131k\u00e7a arkadan yeni bir otob\u00fcs gelecek mi, diye kola\u00e7an etmeye ba\u015flad\u0131. Ah hep bir kurtar\u0131c\u0131dan medet uman, feragatten keramet uman, kendine g\u00fcvensiz, hi\u00e7bir kimseye, hi\u00e7bir konuda g\u00fcven telkin edemeyen Musab\u2026 Nihayet t\u00fcm m\u00fcmk\u00fcnlerden ve mucizelerden umudu kesip omuz omuza iti\u015fip kak\u0131\u015f\u0131p otob\u00fcse s\u0131\u011f\u0131\u015fmay\u0131 ba\u015fard\u0131. S\u0131\u011f\u0131nt\u0131 Musab!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Her an eli kula\u011f\u0131nda g\u00fcrleyip bo\u015falacakm\u0131\u015f gibi duran ya\u011fmura gebe gri g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc otob\u00fcs\u00fcn i\u00e7ini lo\u015f bir kasvetle dolduruyordu.  D\u0131\u015fardaki \u00fcrpertiyle terkip ilham verici serinlik i\u00e7eride yerini camlar\u0131 bu\u011fulayan bo\u011fucu bir \u0131s\u0131ya b\u0131rakm\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Her kendine uygun yer edinmek isteyen yolcuya mahcup bir tav\u0131rla yer a\u00e7maktan kendine hen\u00fcz yer edinemeyen aman efendim, tabii efendim, esta\u011ffurullah efendim Musab\u2019\u0131 afakanlar basmaya ba\u015flam\u0131\u015ft\u0131 bile\u2026 Avu\u00e7lar\u0131 terliyor, kulaklar\u0131 yan\u0131yor, daralan nefesini d\u00fczenleyebilmek i\u00e7in ara ara derin nefesler al\u0131p vermeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yordu. Anas\u0131n\u0131n kuzusu Musab, nihayet herkes kendine uygun yer edindikten sonra artakalan k\u00f6\u015fe kuytuda bir dire\u011fe tutunup b\u00f6ylece yer edinebildi. Yerini edinir edinmez kimseye rahats\u0131zl\u0131k verip vermedi\u011finden emin olabilmek i\u00e7in bak\u0131nd\u0131 ve s\u0131rt\u0131n\u0131 bu\u011fulanm\u0131\u015f cama dayad\u0131. Umut fakirimizin ekme\u011fi, \u015f\u00f6yle h\u0131zla kimseciklere sezdirmemeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015farak otob\u00fcs\u00fcn i\u00e7ini g\u00f6zleriyle tarad\u0131. \u0130lk durakta bo\u015falmas\u0131 durumunda av\u0131n\u0131 bekleyen bir s\u0131rtlan gibi at\u0131l\u0131verip de kapabilece\u011fi en m\u00fcnasip yerleri kendince belirledi. Puslu havalar\u0131n kurdu Musab, anas\u0131n\u0131n g\u00f6z\u00fc Musab, az buzda \u00e7apk\u0131n de\u011fildir hani her otob\u00fcste mutlaka bir han\u0131mefendiyi g\u00f6z\u00fcne kestirir. Toplu ta\u015f\u0131ma hatlar\u0131n\u0131n Don Juan\u2019\u0131, iki durak aras\u0131 Casanova\u2019s\u0131, Zorba on the bus, ilk te\u015febb\u00fcs\u00fcnde g\u00f6z\u00fcne kimseyi kestirememi\u015f olman\u0131n sukutuhayaliyle boynunu b\u00fckt\u00fc. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00c7o\u011fu zaman talihli biri say\u0131lmazd\u0131 ya bu defa her an imdad\u0131na yeti\u015fmesini umdu\u011fu k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck mucizelerden biri ger\u00e7ekle\u015fti ve \u015fans\u0131 yaver gitti. \u0130lk durakta ayakta hi\u00e7bir yolcu kalmayacak kadar ki\u015fi otob\u00fcsten indi. Her m\u00fccadelenin m\u00fclzemi Musab \u00e7ok \u015f\u00fck\u00fcr ki yine hi\u00e7bir rekabete hacet kalmadan kolay bir zafer edinebilecekti. Halk otob\u00fcslerinin Napolyon\u2019u yine de utanga\u00e7 centilmenli\u011fini elden b\u0131rakmadan herkesin bir yerlere oturdu\u011fundan emin olmadan \u00f6nce istifini hi\u00e7 bozmad\u0131. Herkes yerini ald\u0131ktan sonra hi\u00e7 kimsenin tercih etmedi\u011fi Austerlitz\u2019ine do\u011fru g\u00f6z\u00fc tok m\u00fcmtazl\u0131\u011f\u0131n vermi\u015f oldu\u011fu ma\u011frurlukla y\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fc ve taht\u0131na kuruldu. Sizinle yar\u0131\u015fmayan birini yenemezsiniz!<\/em> Yar\u0131\u015fmad\u0131, yenilmedi, a\u00e7\u0131k se\u00e7ik sizinle oynamad\u0131. Ah! \u015fiddetle \u00fc\u00e7 puana ihtiyac\u0131 olan Musab, varl\u0131\u011f\u0131 m\u00fcphem, k\u0131r\u0131lgan \u00f6zg\u00fcveni en \u00f6nemsiz aksilikte tuzla buz olmas\u0131n diye k\u0131m\u0131ldayam\u0131yordu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Alerjik ast\u0131mdan muzdarip ne var ki yine de iflah olmaz bir sigara tiryakisi Musab, pe\u015f pe\u015fe ziftlendi\u011fi sigaralardan \u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fc tutulmu\u015f s\u0131rt\u0131n\u0131 gerip bir nebze de olsa rahatlamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Derin bir nefes al\u0131p yeniden etraf\u0131n\u0131 s\u00fczd\u00fckten sonra telefonunu sat\u0131n al\u0131rken cihaz\u0131n yan\u0131nda e\u015fantiyondan verilmi\u015f eflatun renkli kulakl\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131p kula\u011f\u0131na yerle\u015ftirdi. Ucuz yollu Musab, Android Musab, telefon ekran\u0131ndaki banka sms\u2019lerini, ka\u00e7ak bahis sitelerinin ho\u015f geldin kampanyas\u0131 mesajlar\u0131n\u0131, neden kat\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bilmedi\u011fi WhatsApp gruplar\u0131n\u0131n telefon ekran\u0131n\u0131 dolduran ileti bildirimlerini, GSM operat\u00f6r\u00fcnden gelen kampanya ve kotan\u0131z\u0131 a\u015ft\u0131n\u0131z bilgilendirmelerini, al\u0131\u015fveri\u015f uygulamalar\u0131ndan gelen ka\u00e7\u0131r\u0131lmayacak indirim f\u0131rsatlar\u0131n\u0131, bilet sat\u0131n alma uygulamalar\u0131n bir tekine dahi gitmedi\u011fi konser hat\u0131rlatmalar\u0131n\u0131,  Netflix\u2019ten gelen sizin i\u00e7in se\u00e7tik \u00f6nerilerini, \u0130defix\u2019ten gelen saat bilmem ka\u00e7a kadar ge\u00e7erli indirim kuponlar\u0131n\u0131, t\u00fcm bu bok-p\u00fcs\u00fcrleri sanki g\u00f6zden ka\u00e7\u0131rmamas\u0131 gereken bir \u015feyler olabilirmi\u015f\u00e7esine tek tek ba\u015f parma\u011f\u0131 marifetiyle ekran\u0131n soluna do\u011fru iterek sildi. K\u0131sayollar\u0131n Evliya \u00c7elebi\u2019si, internet kotas\u0131n\u0131n az\u0131l\u0131 d\u00fc\u015fman\u0131 m\u00fczik uygulamas\u0131nda playlistin rastgele \u00e7al butonuna bast\u0131. T\u00fcrkiye\u2019nin g\u00fcneyi, Suriye\u2019nin kuzeyi, iki g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcn \u00e7i\u00e7e\u011fi, yitik cennetin bah\u00e7esi havas\u0131z, lo\u015f otob\u00fcs\u00fcn i\u00e7ine zahter kokusu gibi doluverdi. Otob\u00fcs, sabah do\u011fan g\u00fcne\u015fin \u00fczerinden y\u00fckseldi\u011fi zeytin bah\u00e7esi gibi ayd\u0131nlan\u0131verdi: \u201cAla delunu, ala delune! Veyl beyn gurb\u2019il watan hanune<\/em> ala delunu ala delune ene gadi beledi ehzen meykune emmi ya emmi habibi weynu? Sakkir\u2019ul bahr beyn u beynu\u2019\u2019 Kendi<\/em> kendine g\u00fcl\u00fcmsedi; biliyor ki g\u00fcl\u00fcmsedik\u00e7e Belmondo\u2019dan ziyade mu\u015fmulaya benziyordu. Kendini bilme ilminin alimi Musab, kendi kendinin yarg\u0131c\u0131 Musab, kendinin gardiyan\u0131 Musab \u015fark\u0131 bitti, ritim de\u011fi\u015fti. Kent de\u011fi\u015fti, co\u011frafya de\u011fi\u015fti, ses de\u011fi\u015fti\u2026  G\u00f6zleri derine gitti: akl\u0131na biri geldi, g\u00fcl\u00fcmsedi. Kad\u0131n kuzeyli seviyor. Musab en \u00e7ok Suriye\u2019nin kuzeyini biliyor. Musab, Suriye\u2019nin kuzeyini \u00fclke biliyor! \u015eark\u0131 da de\u011fi\u015fti: \u201cg\u00fcl kendine bak ne kadar g\u00fczelsin, d\u00fcnya kadar g\u00fczelsin\u2019\u2019\u2026<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

            Her durakta yolcu say\u0131s\u0131 daha da azal\u0131yordu.  Art\u0131k hi\u00e7 kimselerin gitmedi\u011fi istikametlerin yolcusu Musab, tarihi az\u0131nl\u0131klar yapar d\u00f6nme bu yollardan Musab, iyiden iyiye kamburunu \u00e7\u0131kararak ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 telefonuna g\u00f6md\u00fc. Bu haliyle hi\u00e7 \u015fans\u0131 olmayan Musab, son dakika geli\u015fmelerden, fla\u015f haberlerden, duyunca \u015fok olacaks\u0131n\u0131zlardan, g\u00f6renleri hayretlere d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrenlerden, bilmem kim yine haddini a\u015ft\u0131lardan, \u00f6tekinden k\u00fcstah a\u00e7\u0131klamalardan, hain sald\u0131r\u0131lardan, transfer \u00e7al\u0131mlar\u0131ndan, s\u00fcrpriz \u00fc\u00e7 puanlardan mutlaka haberdar olmas\u0131 gereken Musab, \u00e7a\u011f\u0131n\u0131n evrensel bir yurtta\u015f\u0131 olman\u0131n, topluma duyarl\u0131, politikayla ve akt\u00fcaliteyle ha\u015f\u0131r ne\u015fir bir insan olman\u0131n en elzem ni\u015fanesi olarak elbette evvela Twitter\u2019a girdi. Musab, anlam mutabakatlar\u0131n\u0131n, toplumsal s\u00f6zle\u015fmelerin g\u00f6n\u00fcls\u00fcz imzac\u0131s\u0131, Vah muhalefet \u015ferhi Musab, kitlesel rit\u00fcellerin \u00e7\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131 yanc\u0131s\u0131, m\u00fcdavimi oldu\u011fu bu k\u00fcresel kahvehaneye giriverdi. Hele bismillah kap\u0131dan i\u00e7eri ad\u0131m\u0131n\u0131 atmam\u0131\u015ft\u0131 ki biri yine oradan en olmayacak meselelerdeki en olmayacak en vasat fikirlerini hayrete mucib bir \u00f6zg\u00fcvenle en y\u00fcksek perdeden ulu orta savuruyordu. Bir ba\u015fkas\u0131 i\u015faret parma\u011f\u0131n\u0131 kald\u0131rm\u0131\u015f k\u0131z\u0131l ordular\u0131n\u0131 k\u0131z\u0131l \u015fafaklara y\u00fcr\u00fct\u00fcyordu. Biri d\u00fcnyaya nizam di\u011feri, gaz yiyen, cop yiyen, yerlerde s\u00fcr\u00fcklenen, kelep\u00e7elenenlere istikamet veriyordu. Biri masan\u0131n \u00fczerine \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f taraflar\u0131 itidalli davranmaya davet ediyor. Herkesi s\u00fck\u00fbnete ve suhulete \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131yordu. Mehdiler, mesihler, peygamberler, \u015feyhler, hocalar, bilimciler, en birinciler, her bran\u015f\u0131n \u015fampiyonlar\u0131, rekortmenler, yurtseverler, vatanseverler her bir yerden kurtulu\u015f mu\u015ftular\u0131, ayetler y\u00fckseliyordu. Biri penalt\u0131s\u0131n\u0131, beriki ofsayt\u0131n\u0131, \u00f6b\u00fcr\u00fc kupas\u0131n\u0131 istiyordu. Herkes hakemleri d\u00f6v\u00fcyordu. O biri, t\u00fcm komplolar\u0131 bir \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131da \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcyordu. Biri k\u0131rk g\u00fcnde g\u00f6be\u011fini eritiyordu. Biri malt\u0131n\u0131 alm\u0131\u015f sabah rutinini asla ihmal etmiyordu.  Yoginin akran\u0131 toksik ili\u015fkisine veryans\u0131n edip detoksunu yudumluyordu. Bir di\u011feri masay\u0131 deviriyordu, sandalyeler, ahkamlar, politik do\u011frular, yat\u0131r\u0131m tavsiyesi de\u011fildirler, coinler, bonolar, halka arzlar, brokerlar, pornolar, Suriyeliler, Afganlar, \u015fark\u0131lar, t\u00fcrk\u00fcler, uzun havalar havada u\u00e7u\u015fuyordu. Birileri t\u00fcm bu k\u0131z\u0131l k\u0131yamet h\u0131r g\u00fcr\u00fcn i\u00e7inde halen komiklik ediyordu. At binenin, k\u0131l\u0131\u00e7 ku\u015fanan\u0131n muhabere meydan\u0131nda kan g\u00f6vdeyi g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcyordu.  Bu denli \u00e7\u0131\u011fr\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f herc\u00fcmer\u00e7e daha fazla katlanamad\u0131. Sosyal medya, sosyal anksiyetesine z\u0131mpara etkisi yap\u0131yordu., Hiddetleniyor, s\u0131k\u0131l\u0131yor, daral\u0131yordu Musab, \u00f6nemli \u015fahsiyetim benim. \u00dcstelik laubalilikten asla haz etmezdi. El \u00e7abuklu\u011fu marifet, \u00e7abucak \u0130nstgram\u2019a ge\u00e7iverdi. \u00c7ubukla piyano \u00e7alan kedi videosu, unutulmaz \u015fark\u0131lar, Kolpa\u00e7ino\u2019dan kesitler, Monica Belluci postlar\u0131 derken birka\u00e7 kal\u00e7aya bakt\u0131, \u00fc\u00e7 d\u00f6rt kalp, bir iki alev g\u00f6nderdi. DM kutular\u0131n\u0131n Filippo \u0130nzaghi\u2019si, fox in the box Musab, Ronaldinho, Thierry Henry, Vodafone\u2019da indirim var! Kampanya! videolar\u0131, biraz da doksanl\u0131 y\u0131llardan futbol editleri izleyip ne\u015felendi. Basit zevklerin insan\u0131 Musab! Aleladeli\u011fin kuyusunda Yusuf, Musab, can\u0131 s\u0131k\u0131ld\u0131. Ne kifayetsiz i\u015flerle vakit \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcyorum diye i\u00e7inden ge\u00e7irip kendine efk\u00e2r edindi. Kendine efkarlar icat etmekte her zaman mahirdi Musab; g\u00f6zlerini telefonun ekran\u0131ndan kald\u0131rd\u0131. Pencereden ak\u0131p giden caddeleri izlemeye koyuldu. Bunu \u00e7ocukluktan beri severdi. Kald\u0131r\u0131mda y\u00fcr\u00fcyen, duran bir anda gelip ge\u00e7en insanlara bakmay\u0131, tabelalar\u0131 okumay\u0131, caddeleri ve binalar\u0131n yap\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131 izlemeyi, kendince baz\u0131 anlamlar uydurup, g\u00f6zlemler yap\u0131p bunlardan ufak tespitler \u00e7\u0131karmay\u0131 hep sevmi\u015fti. Neden art\u0131k daha az etraf\u0131na bak\u0131yordu? Ne vard\u0131 bu telefonda? Neden t\u00fcm d\u00fcnyadan haberdar olmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rken kendinden, en yak\u0131n etraf\u0131nda olup bitenlerden, ak\u0131p giden hayat\u0131ndan bu kadar bihaberdi? S\u00fcrekli ba\u015fka birilerinin filtrelenmi\u015f hayatlar\u0131n\u0131 seyredip, o ger\u00e7ekte ya\u015fanmayan hayatlara imrenip kendi hayat\u0131na kahrediyordu. Musab i\u00e7in hayat hep bir g\u00fcn ileride ya\u015fanacak bir \u015fey gibiydi. Birisi, \u00e7o\u011fu kez muhayyel olan birisi, bazan da hep o hat\u0131rlay\u0131p durdu\u011fu kad\u0131n bir g\u00fcn \u00e7\u0131k\u0131p gelecekti ve her \u015feyi derleyip toparlay\u0131p -haydi art\u0131k biz de ya\u015f\u0131yoruz-<\/em> diyecekti. Musab tamamlanacakt\u0131 ve ya\u015famaya ba\u015flayabilecekti.  Bu ona \u00f6\u011fretilmi\u015f miydi? Buna bir bi\u00e7imde ikna m\u0131 edilmi\u015fti? Yoksa sahiden bu onun f\u0131trat\u0131nda m\u0131 vard\u0131? Musab, kendini eksik g\u00f6ren ki\u015fiydi. Kendini kusurlu bulan, kendini hatal\u0131 bulan, kendini lay\u0131k g\u00f6remeyen, kendinden memnun olamayan, hayat\u0131ndan memnun olmayan ki\u015fiydi.  Musab ya\u015famay\u0131 bile kurgulayan ki\u015fiydi. Musab bir seyirciydi, hem de biletini en k\u00f6t\u00fc koltuktan sat\u0131n alm\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Sahiden ama de\u011fiyor muydu?  Tam da art\u0131k pencereden ak\u0131p giden sokaklar\u0131 g\u00f6remez olmu\u015f kafas\u0131n\u0131n i\u00e7erisinde neredeyse her g\u00fcn kurdu\u011fu mahkemede bir kez daha, en a\u011f\u0131r ithamlarla kendini su\u00e7lamaya ve yarg\u0131lamaya dal\u0131p gitmi\u015fken caddeden bir otob\u00fcs\u00fcn ge\u00e7ti\u011fini fark etti. Bak\u0131ml\u0131, giyim ku\u015fam\u0131ndan vars\u0131l oldu\u011fu belli olan ya\u015fl\u0131 bir adam, otob\u00fcs\u00fcn muavin mahallinde dikilmi\u015f elinde mikrofonla insanlara sesleniyordu. Musab adam\u0131n ne dedi\u011fini i\u015fitemiyordu. –Bu kimdi ya?<\/em> diye i\u00e7inden ge\u00e7irdi. Bir m\u00fchlet g\u00f6zlerini k\u0131s\u0131p an\u0131msamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131. –Evraka, G\u00fcrsel Tekin bu<\/em>! – dedi i\u00e7inden ve ne \u00e7ok \u015feyi bildi\u011fini, ne \u00e7ok ki\u015fiyi tan\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcp kendini kutlarcas\u0131na g\u00fcl\u00fcmsedi ve i\u00e7 sesiyle: \u201cAh i\u015fte B\u00fcy\u00fck Kul\u00fcpte e\u011fleniyorlar.  G\u00fcrsel Tekin orda m\u0131? Kemal Bey, G\u00fcrsel Tekin orda m\u0131?<\/em>\u201d diye \u00fcnlendi ve \u00e7ok e\u011flendi. Kendi \u015fakas\u0131na kendi g\u00fclen Musab, kendi kendine e\u011flenen Musab, laf\u0131 gedi\u011fine koyan Musab! Ya veyle<\/em> Musab.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u015eark\u0131lar, \u015fakalar, mahkemeler, yarg\u0131lamalar, an\u0131msamalar derken az gitti uz gitti Musab inece\u011fi dura\u011fa vas\u0131l oldu.  Oturdu\u011fu yerden arkas\u0131na do\u011fru gerinip omzunun \u00fczerinden inece\u011fi dura\u011f\u0131n bu olup olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131nda emin olmak i\u00e7in durak tabelas\u0131na bakt\u0131. Emin oldu. G\u00f6z\u00fcyle g\u00f6rmedi\u011fi \u015feye inanmayan Musab, diyalektik materyalizmin son \u015fakirdi Musab, koltu\u011fundan kalkt\u0131. Kuyruk sokumunda sinir s\u0131k\u0131\u015fmas\u0131 vard\u0131. Ne vakit uzun s\u00fcre otursa a\u011f\u0131r\u0131r. Belini tutarak do\u011fruldu. Kendine dikkat etmeyen Musab, kendi kendine bakmaktan aciz Musab, kap\u0131ya do\u011fru y\u00f6neldi, tam kap\u0131ya varm\u0131\u015fken biriyle g\u00f6z g\u00f6ze geldi. Tan\u0131d\u0131k biriydi, ama kimdi? Tan\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan emindi ama \u00e7\u0131karamad\u0131. Yine de adam hani her g\u00fcn ayn\u0131 yerde g\u00f6rmekten art\u0131k fark\u0131na varamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z ancak ba\u015fka bir yerde kar\u015f\u0131la\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131zda hemen fark etti\u011fimiz biri gibiydi, \u00e7ok tan\u0131d\u0131kt\u0131. Musab, ne olur ne olmaz diyerek kim oldu\u011funu \u00e7\u0131karamasa da g\u00fcl\u00fcmseyerek ba\u015f\u0131yla adam\u0131 selamlad\u0131 adam kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131k vermedi. Musab, buna bir miktar bozuldu ama \u00e7ok da \u00fczerinde durmad\u0131. B\u00fcy\u00fckl\u00fck hep onda kal\u0131rd\u0131. Nezaketi elden b\u0131rakmazd\u0131. Efendi Musab, medenili\u011finin ho\u015fnutlu\u011fuyla otob\u00fcsten indi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u0130nceden bir ya\u011fmur ba\u015flam\u0131\u015ft\u0131. \u0130\u00e7ini yumu\u015fak bir \u00fcrperti kaplad\u0131. Kendini daha iyi hissediyordu. Caddenin ba\u015f\u0131na kadar y\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fc. Kap\u00fc\u015fonunu ba\u015f\u0131na \u00e7ekti.  Caddenin hemen ba\u015f\u0131nda bir kenarda durup sigaras\u0131n\u0131 yakt\u0131. \u0130nsanlar\u0131 seyretmeye koyuldu. Az \u00f6nce otob\u00fcste kar\u015f\u0131la\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131 adam elinde mavi bir ma\u011faza po\u015fetiyle yan\u0131ndan ge\u00e7ip gitti. Seyreden Musab, sald\u0131rgan olmayan k\u00fcf\u00fcr tonlamas\u0131yla -Kimdi lan bu-?<\/em> dedi. Sonra hemen k\u00f6\u015fe ba\u015f\u0131ndaki kitap\u00e7\u0131n\u0131n vitrinine kafas\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7evirip i\u00e7eri mi girsem diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc. Hi\u00e7bir mesele hakk\u0131nda uzun uzad\u0131ya d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnemeyen Musab, gelip ge\u00e7ici Musab, insanlar\u0131 seyretmeye devam etti. Daha \u00e7ok kad\u0131nlara dikkat ediyordu. Be\u011fendi\u011fi bir ki\u015fi oldu\u011funda kendisinin o an orada ki varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n bile fark\u0131nda olmayan, bak\u0131lan ki\u015fiyi rahats\u0131z etmemek i\u00e7in hemen bak\u0131\u015flar\u0131n\u0131 ba\u015fka y\u00f6ne ka\u00e7\u0131r\u0131yordu. Bitmekte olan sigaras\u0131n\u0131 yere at\u0131p \u00fczerine bast\u0131. \u00c7ok haval\u0131yd\u0131. Sanki m\u00fcsabakaya haz\u0131rlanan bir boks\u00f6r edas\u0131yla pantolonunu kemerinden tutup yukar\u0131 do\u011fru \u00e7ekerek d\u00fczeltti. Caddenin akan kalabal\u0131\u011f\u0131na kar\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Mekanlar\u0131, ma\u011fazalar\u0131, kitap\u00e7\u0131lar\u0131 \u0131slak caddeye akseden rengarenk \u0131\u015f\u0131klar\u0131 seyrederek usul usul y\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fc. Bir vakit m\u00fczik enstr\u00fcmanlar\u0131 satan bir d\u00fckk\u00e2n\u0131n \u00f6n\u00fcnde durdu.  Sanki anl\u0131yormu\u015f gibi vitrindeki uda bak\u0131nd\u0131 sadece kendisinin i\u015fitebilece\u011fi \u015fekilde \u2013 ne g\u00fczel bir \u015fey- <\/em>dedi. <\/em>Bazan da kitap\u00e7\u0131lar\u0131n vitrinlerinin \u00f6n\u00fcnde durup \u00d6zdil yine yeni ne tezgahlar a\u00e7m\u0131\u015f diye kendince tefti\u015f ediyordu. Her yeni \u00d6zdil kitab\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcnde y\u00fcz\u00fcnde alayc\u0131 ac\u0131 bir tebess\u00fcm beliriyordu.  En son durdu\u011fu kitap\u00e7\u0131 vitrinin \u00f6n\u00fcnde \u2013 Ah sizi gidi \u00c7\u0131lg\u0131n T\u00fcrkler, bay\u0131l\u0131rs\u0131n\u0131z \u00d6zdil\u2019ler, Ortay\u2019lar, \u00c7\u00f6la\u015fan\u2019lar, Yal\u00e7\u0131n\u2019lar s\u00f6\u011f\u00fc\u015f seversiniz! <\/em>diye i\u00e7inden ge\u00e7irdi. Yine kendi kendine ne\u015fesini bulmu\u015ftu. O ne\u015feyle yeniden caddeye \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131. Bet sesiyle melodisiz, armonisiz bir \u015fark\u0131 tutturdu: \u2018\u2019a\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131m, ben sana \u00e7ok a\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131m yola \u00e7\u0131k yollarday\u0131m of<\/em>\u2019\u2019 Caddenin ba\u015f\u0131na kadar y\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fc. Cadde bitince durdu.  Etraf\u0131na bak\u0131nd\u0131. Sanki herkes kendisini seyrediyormu\u015f\u00e7as\u0131na bir evhamla bo\u015f bo\u015f doland\u0131\u011f\u0131 anla\u015f\u0131lmas\u0131n diye caddenin ba\u015f\u0131ndaki b\u00fcfeye y\u00f6neldi. Bir Touch Gray ald\u0131. Cebine koydu. Caddeye geri d\u00f6n\u00fcp yukar\u0131ya do\u011fru y\u00fcr\u00fcrken g\u00f6z\u00fcne kestirmi\u015f oldu\u011fu en tenha mek\u00e2na girdi. Gidip en k\u00f6\u015fedeki bo\u015f masaya oturdu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bir bira \u0131smarlad\u0131 yan\u0131nda da tuzlu yer f\u0131st\u0131\u011f\u0131 istedi.  Sipari\u015fini alan garsona ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 belirgin bi\u00e7imde e\u011ferek te\u015fekk\u00fcr etti.  Sigaras\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131p masan\u0131n \u00fczerine koydu. Ceplerinde tesbihini arand\u0131, buldu. Sigara paketinin \u00fczerine b\u0131rakt\u0131. Telefonuyla oyalanmak istemiyordu. Karar\u0131n\u0131 olanca h\u0131zla de\u011fi\u015ftirip telefonunu cebinden \u00e7\u0131kard\u0131. Herhangi bir hususi ileti almam\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Telefonu, sigara paketinin yan\u0131na ekran\u0131 masaya do\u011fru gelecek \u015fekilde b\u0131rakt\u0131. Kollar\u0131n\u0131 iki yana a\u00e7arak sandalyenin arkal\u0131\u011f\u0131na do\u011fru gerinip s\u0131rt\u0131n\u0131 esnetti. Kabil olan en m\u00fclayim ifadesini tak\u0131n\u0131p mek\u00e2n\u0131n di\u011fer masalar\u0131na g\u00f6z gezdirdi. O esnada sipari\u015fi gelmi\u015fti. Toparlanarak oturu\u015funu d\u00fczeltti ve garsona tekraren te\u015fekk\u00fcr etti. Biray\u0131 biraz sa\u011f\u0131na do\u011fru \u00e7ekti. Cebinden e\u015fantiyon kulakl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 da \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131p telefondan bir \u015fark\u0131 ba\u015flatarak yeniden sokaktan gelip ge\u00e7en insanlar\u0131 seyre koyuldu. \u2018\u2019Y\u00fcz\u00fcmde \u015fu nursuz geceyi utand\u0131r! Ruhum cevap ver! Karanl\u0131kta sald\u0131r!\u2019\u2019<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Soka\u011f\u0131 seyrederken otob\u00fcsteki adam yeniden g\u00f6z\u00fcne ili\u015fti. Biras\u0131ndan bir yudum ald\u0131, sigaras\u0131n\u0131 yakt\u0131. Cowabunga!<\/em> Hat\u0131rlad\u0131! Bu G\u00fcvenlik \u015eubeden Foto Mustafa de\u011fil miydi? Ne ar\u0131yor bu herif burada?<\/em> diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc ama eski bir tan\u0131d\u0131k g\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015f olmas\u0131n\u0131n mutlulu\u011fuyla Foto Mustafa\u2019y\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcne memnun olmu\u015ftu. Foto Mustafa\u2019yla en son bir trafik kontrol\u00fcnde denk gelmi\u015flerdi. –Hay\u0131rd\u0131r Mustafa Hocam sizin telefonda da m\u0131 Bylock \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131<\/em>? diye tak\u0131lm\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Mustafa \u00f6fkelense de bir kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131k vermeden evraklar\u0131 kontrol edip teslim etmi\u015fti. O an\u0131n hazz\u0131n\u0131 yeniden ya\u015fay\u0131p biras\u0131ndan b\u00fcy\u00fck\u00e7e bir yudum ald\u0131. Arkas\u0131na yasland\u0131 keyfi yerine gelmi\u015fti. Telefonu eline al\u0131p yeni bir \u015fark\u0131 oynatt\u0131. \u2018\u2019 Ya\u011fmurun alt\u0131nda bir \u00e7\u0131kmaz sokakta bir \u00f6l\u00fc yat\u0131yor duvar\u0131n arkas\u0131nda hayat fani \u00f6l\u00fcm ani sokaklar dar her zaman ki gibi\u2019\u2019<\/em> Ya\u015f\u0131yorsun bu hayat\u0131 Musab!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Son bir bira daha s\u00f6yledi. Art arda yudumlar al\u0131p \u00e7ar\u00e7abuk bitirdi. Hesab\u0131 rica etti. GS bonus kredi kart\u0131n\u0131 gururla c\u00fczdan\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131p hesab\u0131 \u00f6dedi. Masadaki e\u015fyalar\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6zenle tek tek ceplerine yerle\u015ftirdi. Kalkt\u0131 caddeye \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131. Mek\u00e2n\u0131n kap\u0131s\u0131nda k\u0131sac\u0131k durup son bir sigara daha yakt\u0131. Ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 iki yana \u00e7evirip biraz bak\u0131nd\u0131 ve y\u00fcr\u00fcy\u00fcp az biraz ilerdeki k\u00f6\u015feden otob\u00fcs dura\u011f\u0131na d\u00f6nmek i\u00e7in ara caddeye sapt\u0131 ve Mustafa\u2019yla g\u00f6z g\u00f6ze geldi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

San\u0131r\u0131m bir polisle kar\u015f\u0131la\u015fman\u0131n al\u0131\u015fkanl\u0131\u011f\u0131yla olsa gerek kimli\u011fini \u00e7\u0131karmak i\u00e7in c\u00fczdan\u0131na do\u011fru yeltendi. Foto Mustafa, ustaca bir hamleyle mavi po\u015fetinden tabancay\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kard\u0131, Musab\u2019a do\u011frultu ve \u2018\u2019Seni durman konusunda uyarm\u0131\u015ft\u0131k<\/em>\u2019\u2019 dedi.  Bir ses parlayarak patlad\u0131, \u00e7\u0131nlayarak uzay\u0131p s\u00f6n\u00fcmlendi. Musab i\u00e7ine kapand\u0131. \u00c7\u00f6kt\u00fc. Sesler uzay\u0131p uzakla\u015f\u0131yordu ancak u\u011fultular olarak i\u015fitilebiliyordu. G\u00f6r\u00fcnt\u00fcler bulan\u0131kla\u015f\u0131yordu. Annesini an\u0131msad\u0131. D\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Romal\u0131lar\u0131n da dedi\u011fi gibi: Musab ya\u015fad\u0131!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

*\u2018\u2019Bu d\u00fcnyada hayatta kalmay\u0131 hak eden \u015feyler var.\u2019\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Ehlen Dergisi\u2019nin 4. say\u0131s\u0131nda yay\u0131mlanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r, May\u0131s 2024, Y\u0131l:2 Say\u0131:4)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

MUSTAFA KEMAL ERS\u00d6Z \u2018’al\u00e2 h\u00e2dhihi l-ard m\u00e2 yastahiqqu l-hay\u00e2t \u2019\u2019\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0(Mahmut Dervi\u015f)*\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Her \u015feyin ve herkesin bir ismi olmas\u0131 gerekti\u011fine olan meraktan \u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fc onun bile bir ad\u0131 vard\u0131. Onu \u201cMusab\u201d diye \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131yorlar. Musab, k\u00f6\u015fedeki ki\u015fi, kenardaki ki\u015fi evet o, orada duran i\u015fte otob\u00fcs dura\u011f\u0131n\u0131n kenar\u0131nda bir omzunu cama dayam\u0131\u015f olan; dayanaks\u0131z Musab, otob\u00fcs geciktik\u00e7e bir sigara […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":595,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"tdm_status":"","tdm_grid_status":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-604","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-kultur"},"yoast_head":"\nMUSAB\u2019IN SON G\u00dcN\u00dc - ehlen<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Soka\u011f\u0131 seyrederken otob\u00fcsteki adam yeniden g\u00f6z\u00fcne ili\u015fti. 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